The Game Show Forum
The Game Show Forum => The Big Board => Topic started by: ChuckNet on March 14, 2004, 08:15:58 PM
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During his run on H2, Tom Bergeron has come up w/some spur-of-the-moment lines that were genuinely LOL funny...here are some of my faves:
To a car winner who celebrated his victory by running through the raised "H2" symbols in front of the squares grid: "The good is you won the car, the bad news is that you're gonna have to sell it to pay for repairs to our set!"
To another car winner who thought she could hug Tom and jump joyously at the same time: "It's always been one of my fantasies to have my neck broken by a cheerleader."
After a bonus loss where there were only 2 remaining keys to choose from: "The cue card says 'Reveal Correct Key' (w/mock exasperation)...IT'S THE ONE SHE DIDN'T PICK!"*
To another over-excited bonus winner: "I don't know whether to congratulate you or file a restraining order."
To a contestant who got 8 correct answers in the bonus round, thus winning the car automatically: "Talk about sucking all the drama out of a room!"
To champ Don Reckles, who celebrated a $10K win on last Thu's show by grabbing piles of the prop money and throwing it into the audience: "The good news is you're now up to (whatever), the bad news is 4 audience members are now bleeding from paper cuts!"
Any others?
*No comment on how John Davidson would've handled this particular situation. :-)
Chuck Donegan (The Illustrious "Chuckie Baby")
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It's not a Bergeron-ism (although he did reply "It's getting thick in here already") to Penn and Teller's banter (actually Penn's, since Teller never speaks) during a question about William the Conqueror.
Tom: This famous William had two nicknames. One was 'The Bastard', and the other was what?
Penn: Mr. Shatner.
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Not a line, per se, but I did enjoy him standing in front of the key board on one of those rounds where the contestant ran the table.
And, if you will allow me to go back to "Breakfast Time," I loved it whenever he referred to his two kids--"Cody and Cody." When a clueless viewer wrote in and wondered why he would give his kids the same name, he motioned to the camera and said, "[name]--come here, I want to tell you something--[leans into camera and whispers] I'm joking!"
And if you don't know why he said his kids were "Cody and Cody," remember on Regis' show before Kelly came on?...
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Here's another one from tonight's (3/15) ep, after magician Lance Burton did a God-awful impression of semi-reg Gilbert Gottfried: "I hope you can make that impression disappear!"
Chuck Donegan (The Amused "Chuckie Baby")
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"Skippy, valium, level three!"
"Welcome back to Biography's tribute to Gilbert Gottfried."
"In case we run out of time or this or any other game, we're all going out for drinks."
"For $10,000...and a transcript of today's show..."
And that was just the "You fool!" episode!
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ANother Bergeron statement that comes to mind, though it isn't from Squares, is from his hosting of the MIss America Pageant last September. He said "When I was married.... Reagan was President(pause) of the Screen Actors Guild"
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my favorites are all from Game Show Week Part II:
1) after the contestant got all but 2 keys in the bonus round for a cruise "1 you're cruising 1 you're losing"
2) after Jamie Farr did a plug for his book "If you're just tuning in, welcome to our new show, "Wrasling for Literature" "
3) this one's really a Betty White-ism, but Tom was involed Tom: "This animal has 2 common nicknames *something* and woodpussy." Betty: "Tom would you kiss your mother with that mouth?"
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Oh, I almost forgot...back when the Secret Square had a progressive jackpot and was up around $30K, Tom cracked "The SS hasn't been won since John Davidson hosted the show!"...he recycled this line a coupla seasons later, but used Peter Marshall's name instead.
Chuck Donegan (The Illustrious "Chuckie Baby")
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Not really a Bergeron-ism, but on Monday's show, he did work the original premiere date of Squares into a line about drinking (when Lance Burton levitated the martini glass, TB said something like "we've been trying to control the drinking on this show since 1966)
Forgive me for channeling the resident factoid spewer...
Josh
OT: If you're ever in Vega$, look for the scary billboard and bus advert for Lance Burton and his magic show, then look at H2 this week... something tells me he's been stretched a bit too tight...
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[quote name=\'ChuckNet\' date=\'Mar 16 2004, 12:07 PM\'] Oh, I almost forgot...back when the Secret Square had a progressive jackpot and was up around $30K, Tom cracked "The SS hasn't been won since John Davidson hosted the show!"...he recycled this line a coupla seasons later, but used Peter Marshall's name instead. [/quote]
I recall the first time the Secret Square Stash exceeded $35K. When a contestant finally won it, Tom said something like, "Our next Secret Square will be worth $12.38."
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I quite enjoyed a quote from Monday's episode... when the male contestant stated that he had watched Tom ever since he was two - Tom stated that "yeah, that was back in Boston, when I hosted a talk show when I was nine".
And to boot, when introducing the rules of the game he said to the guy "like you have a chance in hell of winning!"
Good stuff. Any thoughts if we'll get some "classic moments" on the last week?
Cheers,
Ryan :)
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[quote name=\'vtown7\' date=\'Mar 16 2004, 04:57 PM\']Good stuff. Any thoughts if we'll get some "classic moments" on the last week?[/quote]
As long as he doesn't make any comments about Roger King's parentage. :)
A shame they wrapped before Martha was found guilty. He might've said, "well, since Martha Stewart and I aren't working for King World anymore..."
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Just remembered last yr's classic April Fool's Day show...
To obnoxious Ed:
"You're great on excitement, but a little low on the attention span."
"Random question: What's the self-esteem of your students like?"
When things got out of hand:
"Suddenly turning down the hosting job on Card Sharks doesn't seem like a good idea!"
"It's like hosting a show w/the Bickersons!"
Chuck Donegan (The Illustrious "Chuckie Baby")